With the All Souls’ Day way behind us now, I do regret not having taken the time to talk about my grandmother Amélia. She was by my and my sister’s side during our whole childhood, taking us to and bringing us from schools, the doctor and pretty much everywhere else while our parents worked. She fixed us our meals, helped us dress and entertained us with her stories… she did so much.
When she left us in 2012 the pain was so much. I cried a lot, I missed her a lot, and I do miss her to date. This last couple of weeks some things happened that made me think of her very often — what would have she said? What advice would she give me? She had such a simple way to look at things.
At times like this, when memories about her come, being a native Brazilian Portuguese speaker makes me happy. It means I can feel saudades.
Saudade is one of the most beautiful words in the entire world, yet, it incredibly has no English equivalent.
Saudade, this Portuguese word that refers to a melancholic longing or yearning, to a sense of loneliness and incompleteness, constant desire for something — or someone — that does not and probably cannot exist anymore, at least not in the physical sense.
Writing about saudades helps placate them. I love my grandma and always will.